First, I want to say once again to those who had finally stood up to these abusive controlling men. It takes a lot of courage to do that.
In this book that I am holding up in my hand, it talks about angry controlling men. It delves into their mind.
Well, I’m here to tell you that men are not the only angry controlling people out there. There are some women out there who is also angry and very controlling.
A public figure is Hillary Clinton. I believe that she is an angry controlling woman. I believe that was one of the reason that led to former President Bill Clinton to having multiples affairs. I believe that it was Hillary that led Bill to become President in the first place.
Before I delve into the minds of angry controlling men, I will delve into the minds of angry controlling women.
Women who are angry and controlling over their husbands could chased them into the arms of another.
They will henpeck their husbands so bad that they may seek asylum to help them cope with the harsh treatment they are receiving. Some will cheat, and some may not. There health may greatly be affected in that relationship.
There was a woman, I’m grateful that I lost because of a friend because she was very angry and controlling. This friend told me that after he broke up with her. He told me that this woman could had taken me to the cleaners with her high-class living that she was living.
It got me thinking of my nephew and his wife. She is very domineering in that relationship. It is varying on him. You can see it on him. He has health problems and age is creeping up on him. He even lost some of his hair because of her constantly controlling him every step of the way. It’s not good for him and for their kids.
If kids are involved, they will see all that, some will become very shy and reclusive. While others could become abusive themselves. That is the only life they know and is accustomed to.
Some of those who abuse others, was probably abused themselves. They wasn’t able to get the help they needed to stop the cycle of abuse.
They talk about punishing the abusers. What about getting help for the victims. Sure you can punished the abusers; but that won’t stop the cycle of abuse. The focus should be on getting help for the victims of abuse.
Like I said, there are angry controlling women out there as well. It’s just not talked about as angry controlling men.
Some woman will be drawn to angry controlling men because of how they were raised. If their father was angry and controlling; they will married angry controlling men like their father. Just like boys will marry woman like their mother.
One of the reason for men being angry and controlling is jealousy. The reason for that jealousy is having a low self-esteem of themselves.
Some of these angry controlling men were either abused or involve in a controlling situation while growing up. They either witness it from their father or mother.
My mother was in that type of environment. Us kids were witness to that. It was funny, but yet not funny when my step-dad said after she died, “They have been married 40 years and no fight.” They argued a lot. He tried to controlled her but couldn’t because she was an independent woman. Eventually though, he worn her down health wise.
A lot like my nephew’s wife is doing to my nephew.
My step-dad didn’t voted for Hillary Clinton because he was afraid of controlling woman in power.
He had a very low self-esteem. I also believe that he suffered that kind of abuse while growing up himself. He was adopted by a relative of his birth mother. The only reason he was because his adopted father wanted him. His adopted mother never let him live it down either.
So you see, he had some issues that he never dealt with. Because of those issues, he became angry abusive man himself.
My mother told me one of the reason why she kept on working up to her stroke was because she was afraid that he would drive her crazy. She needed a gateway to keep her sanity. Yet she wouldn’t divorce him.
The never got the treatment she was receiving as abuse. As a lot of women or even men in that same situation, as abuse. To them abuse was either physical or sexual not emotional or mentally. If there was no marks of abuse, there was no abuse.
This is what this book talk about also.
Toward the end of my mother’s life, as her health was failing, he was able to wear her down.
It goes to show that if a person is in that type of relationship and don’t seek help; it could affect their health and well-being. If children in that relationship don’t seek counseling they could continue the cycle of abuse into the next generation.
This is one of the reason why men have a man-cave to escape to. They needs to get away for their own sanity.
This also why some may cheat on their controlling abusive spouses as well. They are driven to it. If they come upon someone who is total opposite of their mate, they could secretly become involved with that person out of fear for their life.
Like I said earlier it will also affect their health as well. They will have a lot of health issues. Some may even die before their abusive mate.
So here is a warning to all those abusive controlling people. Be good to your true loving mate or they may leave and never return. If you have an anger problems and it gets in the way of relationship; seek help immediately. If you grew up in that type of environment and wants to stop the cycle of abuse, seek help.
There is help out there for anyone who wants and needs it. You just have to know where to look. Just don’t be too late!!